I saw Jesus today. Okay, no, I didn’t see him physically, where he is in heaven. But while I was praying about my finances, I saw a picture of him in my mind, a vision of sorts. He was sitting by a campfire, near a lake. Jesus always appears to me as a young man, younger (and shorter) than I would expect to see the creator of the universe.
If someone’s going to see a vision of Jesus I would expect that they would see him as he looked here on Earth – Shoulder length brown hair wearing some sort of robe or like he appears in Revelation – a mighty, fearsome warrior. But he never shows himself that way too me.
I’ve always found it odd and perhaps a little unnerving that to me he’s always looked somewhat like Adric, from Dr. Who. If you’re familiar with the old episodes of Dr. Who, you will remember Adric. I will tell you of his final episode from my memories – I watched it many years ago.
In his final episode, the Dr. and his friends are trying to stop a spaceship from blowing up and destroying Earth. They realize that they can’t stop it in time. The Dr. and his friends are going to escape before the ship explodes because there’s nothing they can do. Adric slips away from them at the last moment to go back to try to save Earth. The Dr. and his other friends accidently leave without Adric and then it’s too late to go back for him. Adric manages to cause the spaceship to go back in time, to a time when the Earth never existed, saving Earth. The spaceship explodes. Adric is killed. It is then reveled that not only did Adric save Earth but it is only because of what he did that everything came to exist because the explosion of that ship was the big bang.
Today I finally asked Jesus why he always shows himself to me like that. He told me that it’s because he knows that I revere him. But he shows himself to me like that because of my role – who he’s made me to be. He doesn’t just want me lying prostrate before him. Jesus wants to adventure with me.
So when I saw him while I was praying, he said, “It doesn’t matter.” (That currently I’m not making as much as I feel I need to with my business.) Then he offered me candy. It was like eating the candy would free me from worry and fear. So I ate it.
Then Jesus held out his hand to me and said, “We can go anywhere.” And I think he meant in my stories. So I took his hand.
My most recently published novel, Whispers of a Faded Dreamer, was an interesting but difficult project. I thought it was basically finished back in September of 2013. When I was going through some final edits before publication Jesus told me that he didn’t want aliens in the story and that he wanted to be in it. So I ripped the aliens from the plot and wrote Jesus in, instead. It was interesting – it felt like he was really with me as I was writing the book. I’d pray and ask, “So what would you say here?” And then he’d tell me what to write.
Here’s an excerpt from the book:
Blazing lights shattered the darkness. I cried out and put my hands up to my face. My fear ebbed away, leaving a feeling of peace behind. My arms dropped to my sides and I looked around. I stood on a white tiled floor. Above me shone a bright white light. I couldn’t see what the rest of the room looked like because the light didn’t reach the walls. Whatever else was there was cloaked in shadows. Then I noticed someone standing with me, dressed in white. I had found him.
Even though I was looking for him, I still felt surprised. Shocked even. It was really the High King! “Hello,” I said in a small voice.
“Hi.” He smiled and the smile reached his chocolate brown eyes.
He was not as tall as I thought he’d be, only maybe 5’9” or 5’10”, only a little taller than I was. And his plain brown hair and bowl haircut didn’t speak of his majesty. But I knew who he was, all the same. I wondered if I should sink down to my knees. But I didn’t want to. I wanted to touch him. That’s why I’d come. I know he’s not incorporeal. But I had to really know. I needed to touch him.
Slowly, I reached out but he evaded my probing fingers, still smiling. So I tried again and again to touch him. But he just smiled and danced around me, always staying in the pool of light but just out of reach. Finally, I stopped and just stared into those smiling eyes.
Then he spoke, a voice that was smooth and warm. “Cara, you could have just rung the bell at the castle gate. You didn’t have to dress up like that and climb the wall. I’ve been waiting for you for a long time. I want you here with me.”
I looked down and tears came to my eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sad anymore. I’m just explaining things to you. You are welcome here any time, Darling.”
I smiled at that and looked up into his gentle face. “You’re not incorporeal, are you?” I asked quietly.
He shook his head and held both arms out to me. I ran into the embrace. I half expected him to dodge away again but he didn’t. When I careened wildly into him, he wrapped his arms around me and I threw my arms about his neck. My momentum propelled us and he spun me in a circle and then held me fast. He was solid. I was safe.
I wrote the real Jesus into my fictional story. It took months of rewrites to make the altered plot work. But I’m really glad I did it. I like taking Jesus with me on my adventures.